There's Always One...

Can someone please explain to me why every sports team seems to require the one guy that boasts about how good he is? That guy that tells you about how he scored from half, top left, while the keeper was off his line. The guy that tells you he played with (insert name drop here) and that he wasn't anything special, and how he taught him a lesson when they played. Why? How sad must that guys life be, that he has to dredge up these old stories, supplemented by increasinly ridiculous side notes, every week.
Eventually it gets to the stage where you cease to care that he "Scored, from half, flicked it up with my wrong foot, back to goal, header, keeper off his line by 8 inches, top left, no chance, injury time, final kick of the game, to win the league." Honestly, am I supposed to be impressed by this? Do I care what you did two years ago? No.
I've also come to notice that this guy is usually slow, and probably crap. Every errant pass picked out by his outstanding visi0n is the runners fault, every corner sliced behind the goal was going in but for the wind, every shot skewed wide hit a bobble in the turf. The excuses, much like the stories grow old, quickly. Everyone is a legend in their own mind, you just probably shouldn't try to impress the fact that you actually are one on your teammates.
If I can offer you one piece of advice, please don't ever be that guy, he's a loser, and I hate him.